It’s Not As Bad Once You Start

There are some things that we procrastinate on, delay doing, and avoid unlike anything else. The longer we wait, the more anticipation builds making whatever it is feel insurmountable. This is true for things like doing a cold plunge or taking a cold shower, getting around to doing your taxes, or beginning a difficult conversation.

But the truth of it is, we overestimate how much these things are going to hurt, or how frustrating they’re going to be, or how uncomfortable it might make us. Our minds create a perception that what we’re about to do is a bigger deal than it is, and it keeps us stuck in inaction.

In my experience, I’ve found that it’s not as bad once you start. A cold plunge was colder and more painful in your head than it is when you’re actually in it. Taxes are way more confusing when you’re thinking about them rather than in the thick of doing them. A difficult conversation is way more constructive and natural than you expected it to be.

The reason it's not as bad once you start is because there’s a shift in intention. No longer are you negotiating with yourself about if or when you’re going to do the thing, and instead you start investing yourself in how you’re going to do the thing. ‘If’ creates an uncertainty where your mind gets to fill in the blank with a worst case scenario, but ‘how’ means you’re in the experience of it and there’s less up to interpretation.

Metaphorically it’s like hiking up a mountain. At the bottom as you’re about to start, you look up and see how daunting it is. But once you’re actually hiking, you just have to take it one step at a time. There’s an exaggerated expectation of how hard it’s going to be at the beginning that gets put in its place once you get started.

And rightfully so, that’s why the hardest part of anything is to start. I do a lot of Spartan Races, which are like Tough Mudders with obstacles and barriers, and they say “The hardest part about running a Spartan Race is getting to the starting line.” More dreams die from the fear people experience before getting started than from being incapable of doing it.

So for that thing that feels too big for you, that you don’t feel prepared for, you’ll never feel fully ready for it. And, the fastest way to feel more confident is to begin and you’ll realize, it’s not as hard as you made it out to be in your mind.

It’s not as bad once you start, so get to it! Otherwise you’re choosing to sit in the pain.