"Choose yourself every day."

I was on a call last week with someone who I just met but I can tell is going to become a fast friend. Her name is Lexi and she said “Choose yourself every day.”

Isn’t it crazy that this needs to be a reminder? How many of us are choosing our families, work, social commitments, and so many other things over ourselves? On a busy day the first things to be deprioritized are the things we do for our own self-care, health, and wellness.

And while it’s done with good intentions, the unfortunate part is that this choice comes to the determinant of everything else. Your family, work, and everything else actually gets less of you when you don’t make you a priority. There’s a framework I share called the “Time Pie Analogy”. Basically, think about your day as a pie and your different commitments as different slices - let’s say cut into thirds between work, family, and yourself. 

Logically, you’d think that more time spent on yourself would be a bigger slice that takes up more pie, leaving smaller slices for work and family. While that’s true mathematically in terms of percentages, this assumption is overlooking something critical. When you invest in your self-care, the pie gets bigger. 

Sure the slice for your family is less than a third, but the quantity of slice is bigger because it’s being cut from a bigger pie. And the slice for your work might be smaller too, but you actually get more done because you’re investing in your capacity to do things with more quality.

That’s why choosing yourself makes sense on two levels: First is because you are worthy of it! We talk about making a difference and helping people… Don’t forget the fact that you’re a person too, and choosing to help yourself is an act of charity. And not only that, but the best thing you can do for others is to take care of yourself because it allows you to do everything with more quality.  

So what can you do to choose yourself today? Is it getting some ‘me time’ away from the kids for an hour? Is it paying a little more to get a really healthy meal? Is it going to sleep on time and making people wait until the morning to hear back from you?

Whatever form it takes for you, take action on it! It’s the best thing you can do for others too.